FATHEAD!

GUESS WHAT I JUST DOWNLOADED!!!



Summer House-Gold Motel

i love greta!! haha anyway, i thought since today was a pretty open day for me i'd write a blog, since i've neglected to do so for quite a while now. anyway, i have had a pretty great beginning of the summer! i think everything is pretty well balanced and i've seen the people that i knew i'd be seeing regardless of graduating! i kinda knew before graduation who would stick and who would sort of fall away and it's okay with me... i'll probably still hang out with people sometimes though, i just know who will lose touch is all :]

you know, twitter tells me a lot of what's going on with people and i think it's safe to say that i have kept a safe distance from a lot of shitty things. AND, although i didn't see it then: a window closed on me, but a great big door opened! and jeebs i am so glad!

OH, father's day is coming up! we reinstated my dad's XM radio! haha i kinda wanted to get him a bronco remote but it's all good :] i'm sure he'll be pleased with having a functioning radio again! hahaha although i should have gotten him a Fathead, you know, like on the commercial with the dad and son and the son says, "dad, you're a fathead...LOOK! YOU'RE LITERALLY A FATHEAD...AND SOOOO AM I" hahahaha

if you don't know what a fathead is:

it's basically just a life size sticker. hahaha

have a great summer!

:O

first: i wish i would have planned my life better...

-i didn't plan well enough for college, and now i'm just so clueless, and i think what sucks the most about it is that my parents were little to no help.
-i didn't plan well enough for driving, and now i'm just screwed until i turn 18.
-i didn't plan well enough for prom, and now i have no dress (yet) and my hair is screwed up.
-i didn't plan well enough for graduating, and now i just feel kind of lost :/

second: i over think about insignificant things...

-how do i feel about people? i mean, friends, and family... everyone seems distant lately, but maybe it's my period talking.
-why do i feel like i'm going to die at a young age?
-why am i afraid of EVERYTHING?

third: i thought i'd end this blog on a good note...

-i graduate june 10th
-i have a really great prom date
-i'm eating my favorite ice cream
-hopefully i'm getting a dress tomorrow
-the office season finale tomorrow night

return

i decided that i love the word RETURN. i know it's a common, everyday word. but i just like it. i don't know. haha anyway...i really think i just should have stuck with not wanting anything to do with boys until after i graduate because i hate this feeling. but it's not really a big deal. i'll be over it by monday.
hopefully my dad and i will fix the drain in my shower tomorrow/today. i hate that the water fills the tub when i'm just trying to shower!

i just sorta felt like updating so, there ya go. goodnight all

there goes the fear

i'm somewhat glad that this break is coming to a close... it's been so long and boring. i will be relieved to start sleeping on a normal schedule again.

i have been washing my face nightly, but i have had no luck with my hair. also, i need to come up with some sort of simple solution to this weight issue. it is mainly just a belly fat thing, so i should just focus on exercising i suppose. i'll figure it out because i really do want this. i mean, college is just around the corner, so i should get pretty again :] hahaha. anyway, short blog tonight.


THIS IS A 2007 PICTURE...3 years ago i suppose?

new year

well i suppose i will just point out my resolution. and that would be to fix myself. i seriously have let myself go lately. hahahaha. soooo, i need to eat better and exercise more (NOT RUNNING THOUGH! i hate running) and i definitely need to clear up my face. i was doing so good and then it just went to hell, and my bangs need to be fixed NOW uuuuggghhh. and...i need new clothes DESPERATELY. and, well jeebs. i just need to be more appealing i guess because it's more of a self esteem thing rather than a trying to impress people thing. hahaha. well i guess i'll just call myself a work in progress for now.

btw

"you know what really makes me mad, when stupid ass people tell me how to have a relationship. YOU KNOW WHY YOU DON'T HAVE A SUCCESSFUL RELATIONSHIP!?! because all you care about is sex. or you just can't function the easy things that girls want. when did boys become such selfish pigs who think that they can take advantage of girls... OH YEAH when stupid girls thought they were cool for letting boys take advantage of them. sorry, but i have enough self respect to know when a guy deserves and loves me enough for me to want to have sex with him. call me old-fashioned but i just have enough common sense and respect for myself."


^I wrote that months ago... i still feel that way

close your eyes, just settle settle.

i guess the easiest way to do this is via blog... but, i just had an epiphany. and here it is: ever since the beginning of the year i haven't tried to get close to any boys. not a single one. and i've had the basic outlook that they're all scumbags, which according to any girl i talk to, isn't too far off. but after that whole thing, i don't trust anyone, and i don't want any guys to really touch me. (especially the ones who DO want to) i don't want to ever let anybody get that comfortable with me and i don't want to ever get taken advantage of the way i was. for anybody who is confused as to what i'm talking about, just ask...i'd rather not touch on THAT too much. anyway, i guess this is me explaining why i am the way i am. and for those of you who say, "well veronica, you were like this before this year ya know!" i say, well i gave a more free lifestyle a chance, and it was awful and i was uncomfortable, and i felt on display, and i wanted to throw-up, and i never want to feel that way again. and for those of you who are thinking "well that just happened to you, and it was bad luck" well, i wanna just say that i don't care. i'll never put myself in that position again.

what i've been hoping all year is that when i graduate, i'll never have to speak to certain people ever again, and i'll meet a gentleman, and we'll fall in love, and he'll respect me and every single one of my fears, and precautions, and he won't care when i'm not the ideal girl or the party girl or even the average girl (which most would say is a bad thing but from what i've found, it's entirely rational to say is what's expected). and if that doesn't happen i won't feel like a prude for not giving in because i know that if i don't get that then i am and average girl and i do want the same thing as everyone else. which is kind of stupid to say is my reasoning...because it isn't. i'll be fine if i don't settle, because if i settle i'll feel even worse.

i'm just going on and on aren't i? sorry... anyway, i hope some of this makes sense...(?) if not, i guess my mind can be one big discombobulation of junk.